So sex…a topic that can be pretty hard to talk about. Especially in families. And especially in religious families.
I’m no scientist or researcher or even credible in this topic but I do have observations based on my personal life, interactions, readings, and various resources but it is a topic that needs to be discussed more.
***I’m not really sure how to organize this post so I’m just going to write. I apologize for any typos and grammatical errors.
Talking about sex and our bodies shouldn’t be so taboo or terribly uncomfortable. It’s a topic that needs to be discussed with your own children. Growing up we never talked about sex. We never talking about our bodies changing. It wasn’t until about 2 or 3 years ago that my mother said anything relating to the topic. I was sitting down having brunch with my two sisters and mother that she had randomly said something along the lines of, “I heard that more and more younger generations are having oral sex”. I was mortified. I quickly responded with many many “no’s”, and, “we don’t talk about this stuff”, and “why?!?! I’m eating” comments. I realized that day that, I’ve talking about sex with some friends before-and that wasn’t that awkward. Talking about sex and bodies openly and honestly around and with your kids and doing it when they’re younger helps normalize the topic. It helps children grow to understand how their bodies work. It helps them know that they can talk about their bodies or sex with their parents and not be too fearful of it. It gives them trust. It allows children to learn from their parents because they will learn it from other places eventually.
Talking about sex and bodies help children to grow to love their own body and value it. And hopefully in turn love and respect everyone else’s bodies. This means maybe they don’t judge or bully people with bodies that look different than their’s. Sexual assault and rape may decrease. Maybe individuals who have been victims will understand and/or muster up the will get help.
Talking about sex and our bodies is also very important because then we learn to know what our “normal” is. For the longest time I wasn’t sure what my body was going through. I started my first period when I was about 13 years old. I had weird periods, but that was expected of someone who just started getting it and was still young. Fast forward a few years and my periods were still messed up. They were super irregular and super painful. Over and over I was told it was maybe because I was so skinny (I was a twig until I was about 18 years old) or because I was active. I was put on birth control and that helped. Until I became a bit irregular again. So I went off of birth control. I sometimes didn’t have periods for many many months. Then there were two occasions where I had my period for about 5-6 weeks with a light to regular flow. My periods consisted of constipation, aches in my lower back that were so bad I couldn’t move. sometimes so much blood I’d have to replace my tampon within an hour. Migraines that were light sensitive. Cramps that felt like everything was being pinched, twisted, and battered. I would sleep so much. They were painful. Yeah cramps happen when you get your period and it sucks but I knew there was something wrong with me. I later found out that I would always struggle to have kids because of infertility
Talking about bodies and teaching girls to take notice to their own bodies allows them to be familiar with their bodies and be comfortable in their own skin. Talking about bodies allows girls and guys to know what their “regular” is. They better understand their personal health.
There’s just so much to be gained from talking about sex and our bodies. So you think about this.